Chang Xian’s Reflection About His Retreat At Maha Panna

“People come to this world, they should develop their own spirit and make themselves more thorough in life." I remember that in early July, my mother told me to go to the Maha Pana. At that time, I just graduated from college. Since I had to wait for the military training , I actually have some spare time .So I didn't think much and agreed. Thinking about it now, it may be one of the most important decisions in my life. Although it was not long during the period of Maha Pana, it really made me have a better understanding of my life.
Working：

In the Maha Pana, working is a very important learning content. I remember that when just arrived , I was called to transplant. Since I have never been to the field, I was really nervous that I couldn’t do it well. Fortunately, the people taught me how to transplant, and told me to come slowly and took easy , don't worry too much. So I tried it myself and finally learned to do it. After 4 months, I returned to the field, and the rice seedlings have grown to a height of 1 meter, which is very beautiful. The feeling of this harvest is great . In addition to transplanting, I also experienced the work of growing vegetables, helping trees, moving vines, hanging blades, buried landmarks, culverts, buried pipes, drowning, moving Tibetans Books, etc. These jobs were all done with my own hands. When I was doing all these staff, I understand that I am really weak in the past, and I really appreciate that I have more possibilities.

Hanging blades are my first real initiative to participate in working. Since Cambodia has a rainy season, every time it rains, it will splash water into the room. So the leaves are used to block the rain. We came back and forth and hung more than 30 blades. The job I was responsible for was to tie the blades that were pulled up on the shelf with hemp ropes, and sometimes I would help pull the blades underneath. These tasks were all done by manpower. Now I see this row of blades and I really feel quite fulfilling.

There was inner river inside Maha Pana. Once there it rained heavily, and at that time, I was driving with Monks sitting in the back. Then we received a call from Maha Pana saying that "the temple was flooded." . We went back in a hurry and saw that the water had flooded the height of the ankle and that the fish was swimming inside. As a result, we urgently dispatched all the pumps of the Maha Pana, a total of five, and finally took the night to lower the water level. At 4 o'clock the next day, the master instruct everyone to clean up the mess. We cleaned all the water and the dirt on the floor, and then ate breakfast at 6 o'clock. That experience not only made me experience the power of nature, but I admire the calmness of the Maha Pana in the face of such unexpected problems and the decisiveness in dealing with the problems. So many things happen in one day, and finally it’s just like it’s not happening.

Beside the things above, I’ve done a lot of f work and some of them were really tough. For example, once we had to cleaned up all the water on the road in order to fix the road, but every time we have just finished for two days, it rained again, then we had to start from the beginning. The whole process last for more than 4 times. These jobs are all about natural communication. I can say that I have learned a lot of knowledge and ability that I can't learn in urban life.

Meditation：

It is a bit difficult for me to meditate at first. The people in Maha Pana do meditation with Cross-legged gesture , but my bones are really hard to do. I can't even touch my feet when I am bend down. Later, the Master taught me to do Zen, which is three kinds of Yoga movement.It is to help soften my ligament. I have been practicing three movements for two months.Once when I was practicing, I suddenly feel that my hand could touch my toes. I was very excited at that time, so I practiced Yoga very hard every time. . After doing this for two months, Master said: "Don't practice Yoga all the time Chang Xian, you have to start learning to do meditation." SInce then I began to practice meditation. At the beginning , Doing Cross-leg was still painful, especially the part of the ankle. Master told me that when you had a pain in your foot, you should concentrate on your heart and fight against pain. Keep fighting until you really can't stand it. . After this step-by-step practice, my ligament loose a lot, and I can also cross-legged for a long time. 

Master also shares the essentials of meditation with us. For example, when you are doing meditation, you must concentrate yourself. You should focus on your attention and awareness every time, let your heart settle down. After I was able to practice meditation, the next difficulty I encountered was that I couldn’t focus when I was meditation. At that time, I felt dizzy and want to sleep. Master said in such situation you can stand up to make yourself awake, or watch your own breathing. In short, you must use various methods to refocus yourself. But unfortunately, I know that I didn’t do a good job of meditation before leaving. 

Master’s Words：
Every night, Master would give a speech or lesson to everyone in the temple. I can understand Master's words, but I can't do it because it’s too hard. Master does not only say Dharma.

Sometimes Master will spend time discussing engineering affairs, discussing recent events, or sharing experiences of the trip. But in the end, it will return to the concept of Dharma. Master said, that she hope everyone who comes to Maha Pana will have benefits. The benefits I receive are very practical. My vision, my body, and my heart have all been improved. When something unfortunate happens, if you aren’t prepared, you can easily be defeated, let alone getting over it; why you do meditate in order to calm your heart and enhance your senses. Know; why you do alot of work, because only by improving your spirituality, you can be free from the pain. Practical practice, this is the impression that the entire Maha Pana gave me. If there is a reason to live in theMaha Pana, I believe you can also gain a lot .